Tripura Sundari; the tantric Goddess Archetype of Divine Will and Desire was the great seductress luring me into the mystical.
I was very fascinated by her qualities and envious at the same time.
I wanted to embody those qualities deeply.
Divine will, desire, beauty, the queen of queens…
On top of that I was in turmoil around detachment in my first years of dedicated spiritual practice. All spiritual texts and teachings put detachment from desires and aversions as the primary goal for awakening. How can a creature like me totally driven by desire be spiritual then?
I feel alive and transcendent at the same time only when desire curses through me; when I feel it vibrating inside of me. Whether it is the desire to follow a beautiful butterfly with my eyes as she dances around me or the deep longing for my loved one; whether it is the desire to create a new curriculum or to leave a chapter of my life to move to the next one.
Tantric sexuality circles swimming in desire lacked the refinement my psyche yearned for.
And Sundari brought the answer to me:
“Desire exists in you as in everything. Realize that it also resides in objects and in all that the mind can grasp. Then, in discovering the universality of desire, enter its radiant space.”
Vijnanabhairava Tantra Stanza 105
I was torturing myself for my weak spot for beauty; judging myself as limited by form.
Sundari led me to the essence of beauty beyond form. She brought along friends to my life showered by the rays of Sundari like me who celebrated my distinct radars for noticing beauty in life; be it in a tiny flower on a bush while passing by or in the smile of a baby.
I started to make sense of my particular ways of connecting to the divine in and around me; through love, beauty, longing, desire, sensory perception and absorption; all through the touch of Tripura Sundari.
The teachings came not only as joy and bliss but also through several tests showing me the self-destructive parts of all these qualities.
I can go on and on about this but let's save the rest for my Tripura Sundari workshop now available online!
Check TANTRA MAHAVIDYA page for more details on the program and fill in the form for gaining access to the free introduction discourse to Classical Tantra.
Looking forward to share this precious work with you.
Much love
Dijan
